Let Them Eat [Store-Bought] Cake

I have mentioned that I am gearing up for KC’s Birthday on Sunday. I’ve already ordered two party platters. I make no secret of being the ANTI-Domestic Goddess. I hate to cook. I don’t know why. I just do. It seems like just as much of a chore as cleaning up after. More so. The only kind of cooking that I enjoy even a little is baking. I always loved to help my Mom lick the bowl make cakes, or help my Aunt Judy eat gobs of dough make cookies. So why, WHY am I considering buying a stupid, ordinary sheet cake from Giant Food?? Why?

I will tell you why. Because, I’m not F***ing Betty Crocker, that’s why. Oh, and then there is the fact that I work every day, AND Ted is working on Saturday, AND I will be watching Kelly, AND shopping for whatever else we need, AND cleaning the house. (Another activity I hate, by the way, so that means it’s all the worse when I do finally get to it.) Ok, now I’m whining. Ted will actually help me clean when he’s home on Sunday morning, but you get the point.

Despite all this, I feel very torn between buying the sheet cake and buying boxed mix and canned frosting and going for it. It’s not that hard. It’s not like I’m going to make it from scratch. My Mom was no Domestic Goddess either. She’ll be the first to admit it. But, she always made us special cakes. ALWAYS. Ok, maybe when we got older she started leaning on Sarah Lee a bit more, but that’s ok. It’s different with adult kids. We don’t need cakes shaped like dolls in big dresses. (She actually did that once.)

I really want to make this cake for KC special. Not because she will notice, but because it’s her 1st Birthday. And, what are 1st Birthdays all about? Cake! Cake all over the hands and face, and pictures of it all to laugh at later. I will think on it some more. Maybe I will try. Maybe I will wuss out in the end. My big fear is that I will burn and mangle the cake, and at noon on Sunday have to run to the Giant anyway. We shall see.

Sidebar:
The phrase “F***ing Betty Crocker” has a back-story and is a big inside joke in our house. Ted likes to cook and bake sometimes. It’s actually really nice. We share the cooking responsibility. When we were newly married he mentioned wanting to bake a pie or something like that for a party, or holiday gathering. I can’t really remember exactly. We were in the grocery store when he mentioned it. I looked at him and said, “What are you F***ing Betty Crocker?” I was joking, of course, but he’s never let me live it down.

The truth is, I love that he has that semi-girly side. He makes the most amazing chocolate chip cookies flavored with almond extract. Who knew? He uses no recipe to decide what flavors to add. He’s not afraid to try things and it usually pays off. His Mom is kind of a Domestic Diva. Maybe KC has some of those genes.